Two Nice Angels And A Girl Standing In The Rain Trying Not to Die

Click Pic For Whole Show... © akka b

 

Even Thunder can't budge her. 

How is that possible? Thunder always budges her. 

No, she's unbudgeable. 

What about the Lightning she asked for and was so generously bequeathed? 

She liked it. 

You mean to say it didn't change her life like she expected it to? 

Well, she expected it to, but she didn't really want it to. 

Her reasoning please? 

She wasn't ready. 

And why, pray tell, wasn't she ready?

She said she lost something and wasn't willing to die before she found it. 

Does Thunder & Lightning make her die? 

Usually. 

And that's why she loves it so much? 

Agreed.

Except in this one instance when she wouldn't let it...?

Exactly. 

Because she lost something?

She called it "Purpose" but refused to offer a description. 

So, she didn't reeaally want to find it again. 

Well, she didn't want help finding it again. 

Maybe her "Purpose" got struck by lightning while she was standing in the rain trying not to die?

That seems sensible. Should we tell her?

nah. 

Blankly and a Grin

    

  Staring blankly out the window before my desk - not unusually blankly, (because it's not that unusual for me to be blankly), but definitely blankly blankly. The kind of blankly where you might recall being a certain many years old and a certain many inches high, but you don't know how many - specifically. You're also certain you have done many interesting things over the course of those many certain years - and with great purpose, but the reason for the purpose is forgotten, and also, what the many "interesting things" were - exactly.  

coffee cup (jacket) doodle - akka b

  Staring blankly out the window in front of me, I observe evidence that I have in fact been busy, because of what is grossly spread behind me. Notes taped over the entirety of the wall, stacks of real books and note books on every available surface. Colored pens, pastels, paint brushes strewn, jewelry weaving projects in a half finished mess on the antique tray near my closet, piles of clothes - approximately three of them - in various positions on the bed, carefully heaped on the floor, and thrown with great intention to 'put-away' across the back of the chair that isn't meant for that.

  My blank stare softens into a grin. I'm not sure what I've been doing, but at least it looks worthwhile. If someone - anyone walked in on this, they would likely have some questions. I wouldn't have answers by the way. But I would invite them to stare out the window with me.

I'm a Little Rain Blog

  It rained last night and I feel encouraged to begin again; this beautiful blog that I love. It's April. The last time I posted - it was December. Have I abandoned my readers? No. I toyed with feeling guilty, but it's too boring to feel guilty. Guilty makes me feel stuck. Stuck feels boring. It rained last night - that's not boring. Or guilty. It's beautiful. As beautiful as this sweet little blog that I love. 

I am a cloud

A full little cloud 

That grows up big 

Or shrinks down small 

Or disappears for months

Months of not-at-all

But when I fill up

To over bursting 

I pour down rain 

To quench my thirsting 

This is the place 

Where I get to play

Let my words drop

Wherever they may 

That's why I love -- this blog so tender

It catches the "release"

And returns it to its sender - akka b.

akka b.

DRUNK LOVE HEART - THE CD!

Meet my baby... 

I poured all my heart in to this. All the way. This infusion of sound, melody, words, muse, poems, laugh–tears, ancestors, rivers, rocks, trees, friends, help, love… is designed to pluck your heart strings, make you feel deeper, break open and embrace joy.

THANK YOU – Rory Anton of Pure Fun Records for intuitively knowing the rhythms of my heart. Your beautiful original music and sound compositions make the poems come alive!

Click the photo above or link to purchase physical copy.

Digital downloads coming soon!

SAMPLE IT HERE:
01 Opening Drunk Love Heart by akka b. by drunkloveheart

PURCHASE HERE:  

IT WILL BREAK YOUR HEART - OPEN!

I AM CRAZY EXCITED ABOUT THIS: 

That's all I have to say. 

oops, one more thing...

Releasing CD for public purchase SOON!

TEDx Realized

What an honor! So blessed! 

Thank you TEDx Ojai Women for inviting me to be part of such an amazing ensemble! 

Photo Credit: Ellen Johnson/Sound Visions Media © 2011

Photo Credit: Jodi Womack

Photo Credit: Ellen Johnson/Sound Visions Media © 2011

For a more in depth look at this delicious day - 

check out the blog review below! 

http://coachlisab.blogspot.com/2011/12/relating-to-audience-tedxwomen-style.html

I AM Gratitude

Gratitude is a skill. Don't ever let anyone tell you it's not. To know 'thank you' in your bones is much different than knowing it off the tip of your tongue. You've got to want it, strive for it, grow it and be willing to friend (or kill) the beast that guards the gates to it. I'm not always grateful - I'm often a spoiled little sour puss. BUT when gratitude hits me over the head and enters my heart -

DAMN I FEEL GOOD!! 

And when I feel good, naturally I want to give it away...  

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3 things I am grateful for this season: 

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DECEMBER 1st 

 I've been invited to speak at the local TEDx Conference being hosted in Ojai, California. Whooooooohooooooo!! Between an amazing line up of brilliant women, I will be sharing about the magic of living from the heart, and what happens when we give ourselves...  

PERMISSION TO PLAY

Read event details here: 

 http://www.ted.com/tedx/events/4226

 http://nomorenylons.com/press-release/

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DECEMBER 4th

A good cause event in Ojai (that I will be speaking/poeming at) benefiting the Pine Ridge Lakota Oglala Sioux Indian Reservation in South Dakota. Please click HERE for further details about how you can contribute from near or far.

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DECEMBER 10th 

          SAVE THE DATE

I'm having a BABY!! 

But I'm not telling what kind - YET

You're invited to the birth

OJAI December 10th 7-9pm

DETAILS COMING SOON! 

It's gonna be magnificent. 

If you're not on my email list and would like to be notified, please leave your email in the comment section of this post or email me at: drunkloveheart@gmail.com

HoneyMOONshadoW

My capacity to hold, experience and express love seems directly related to how willing I am to examine, process and let go of darkness and pain.  What I've learned over the past several months of unusually heavy self-reflection, is when faced with gnawing hurt - go deeper. Walking into, and not away from the aching place disempowers the negative self-story where rage and grief breed. 

Letting back Light

and

Love

Watching What I Think

Her lips are covered in beet juice again and her eyes have turned to green. But don't worry about the hearts slipping out the top of her head... 

That's pretty normal this time of year. 

Evidence of Their Influence; Evidently

I could leave poems where I find them, 

but they're always insisting I write them down.

Evidence of their influence; evidently