Becomes an Arrow

Expose yourself.
Let your heart out
Let it OUT!
Let it breathe
Let it speak
Let it fall into your stomach
And further - to your feet
Let it go out your feet
Leaving scratch marks on the hardwood floor
Let it pound and rise through your neck
Let it get stuck there for a while -
If it will help push the rivers out your eyes
Or swell into a song that jumps off your
Quivering lips...

Yes, let lips quiver with heart so full
Exposed
Fully
Quivering
Like an arrow pulled taught over your handmade bow
Your whole life
On the line, on the bow
Like an arrow
One gorgeous heart
Becomes an arrow 

akka b.

He SAID

SIGH

I MARRY MYSELF

my

dearly

b.

loved

take my hand

I arrive at this altar 

apprehensive

Terrified 

to say the things 

I'm about to say:

   




Please love me, 

             hold me, 

     

                             Never let 

            me 

                         go

I'll 

be 

leaving 

my 

tears 

with 

you

Promise to remind 

me of beauty 
my soul

Should ever I lose sight of 
my deep significance

 

 I'll be letting my dreams 

                               on you;

rouse you

 Promise to laugh

at my conviction
Only when I pass

under shadow
of doubt

I share my 

Passion/



 fruit

Stay

Even when it feels 

too precious; 

too breakable

Please stay - in the believing land

    I trust you

I pray you trust me too

Trust

Willingness. Laughter. Invention. Enthusiasm. Intelligence. Humanness. Holiness. Half-baked. Full-baked. Unripened still. 

my

dearly

b.

loved

gathered in me today

hold my hand, love my heart, say you will...

love yourSelf.

i love mySelf.

marry yourSelf.

i marry mySelf.

promise

i promise.

i do.

*

Photos by Raksha Boiteau

Twin Lemon and a Beeswax Ball

This morning in the coffee shop someone gifted me a twin-lemon and a beeswax ball. The poet in me feeds off moments like these. Knowing there is a message in everything - even if the message is as simple as - RECEIVE. But anyway... I found it an interesting combination. And absolutely I don't know what it means. But even if I did... I wonder if I would tell you. 

© akka b.

eye see

*

 beyond

what you said. and didn't say

why you loved. but couldn't lay

 eye see

 the dragon. you fight. over there

and the dragon. i fight. over here

eye see

why swords. might seem. useful

and shields. might seem. necessary

eye see

why you might like 

and i might like

hiding

in caves. with swords. and shields. and dragons

i see.

*

*

*

i wonder what the dragon sees?

Once Upon a Time There Was a Rock Tumbler... PART II

(Continued from PART I)

...it was love at first sight. 

*

"OH JUST THINK OF ALL THE THINGS I CAN DO WITH A ROCK TUMBLER!" 

Proclaimed The Poet. 

I can talk to it. 

Take it for walks. 

We can hang out together. 

Eat together.

Sleep together? 

I'll even take it out for a beer... 

Photos: Jonas Llewellyn MacPhail & Lisa Casoni

THE POET of course, being delusional, did not know that a Rock Tumbler was not something, someONE typically has a relationship with. She went on courting it anyway, as if nothing out of the ordinary was happening.

Until one day, something out of the ordinary, absolutely did. 

TO BE CONTINUED...

Once Upon a Time, There was a Rock Tumbler... PART I

*

ONCE UPON A TIME

There was a Rock Tumbler

It was a very nice Rock Tumbler 

And it lived alone

In a very nice rock field.

In that same rock field

There was also a Poet

She was a very nice Poet

ONCE UPON A TIME

THE POET

Had been dreaming of Rock Tumblers

All her life

So as you might imagine

When she finally bumped into 

THE ROCK TUMBLER

Who also lived in the rock field

Well,

It was love at first sight...

TO BE CONTINUED...

PART II

I'm in love with 'DANG IT' I love it sooo much!

dang it. 

I wasn't gonna do it. 

But I did it

I love it SOOO much. 

DANG 

and

IT

How good are those two words together?

The IT on its own is just an IT

but add DANG and... 

The DANG on its own is just a DANG

but add IT and...

DANG IT 

Now doesn't that feel good to say? 

What I mean is, "Dang it, doesn't that feel good to say?"

But reverse and WOW also, sooo good. 

IT DANG!

aha ha ha ha ha... 

"IT DANG, IT'S COLD OUTSIDE!"

or 

"HOT DANG IT, IT'S WARM OVER IN HERE!"

dang it, i love to dang it. 

What is a DANG anyway? 

it.

WASHING MACHINE

In your absence 

My mind becomes washing machine

Pieces of me sloshing

Turny 

Twisty

Rushing

Gushing

Hushing

Pieces I would like tucked neatly inside my drawer

Wet

Mingled

Stretched

Soaked

Undone

The purpose of washing

Wetting

Cleansing

Releasing

Form

Thank God for metaphors, truly

And eventual drying, resorting, folding, putting

Resting

Wrestling

Washing

Resting

Watching

Washing

Resting

More

Let the Elves in...

Let the Elves in...

*

The Kissing Waves

I'm worlds away from you

Worlds from the heaven we once tasted on our boat of open seas

The kissing waves rocked all sense from me

And I became glued to the freedom bestowed in this convergence

I'm stomping mad about that

Being glued to something so timeless

Uncontainable

This world away from you, right here

I will never know how to love less than this


*

THE PURPOSE OF DOING SOMETHING >>>>> cha cha cha!

DOING SOMETHING - cha cha cha!

Is one way to not do nothing. 

Trading your nothing for a something, is the same as trading something for a nothing, unless your nothing is the something that you are trading nothing for. 

Oh shoot. What have I done?

I'm not sure what doing something means actually. Except that sometimes when I've been doing one thing one way for a very long while, I know that the only way to change the way I've been doing that one thing... (that has begun to feel like nothing) is by doing something that I have never done before. OR by doing something that I used to do a lot of - that I forgot about - that I really used to like. OR by doing something very, very different from the way I would normally do that something.

Which to be quite frank, often requires doing nothing. Even though nothing often requires some sort of something. But I've probably already said that.

Bottom line is this.

DO SOMETHING - cha cha cha!

DO NOTHING - cha cha cha! 

 

THE PURPOSE OF DOING NOTHING

THERE'S MORE TO IT THAN MEETS THE EYE...

Staring at walls

Walking up a small or large hill

Watching for rattlesnakes

Making a smoothie

Sitting there

Standing there

Laying around

Taking a nap

Taking one more nap for good measure

Um, doing computer stuff

Talking on the phone a lot

Sitting around with people

Making the bed

Unmaking the bed

Let's see...

Lying in the bed that is made or unmade

Learning rap moves

Making up nonexistent words

Drawing

Reading

Falling asleep while reading

Napping again (because of the falling asleep while reading situation)

Trying

Wondering

Wondering about trying

Un-trying  

Purposeful

Nothing.

And so on and so forth... 

n.o.s.t.a.l.g.i.a

*

"We spoke some words, 

but they were not important. 

It was a sense of nostalgia 

that wove us to one another.

A timeless comfort. 

Like that 'just-right' pillow 

at the end of a long-ass day."

- akka b.

*

LET ME: make loVe to it

The way you think it is, 

Even when it is not particularly;

I love that about you,

About your brain.

Let me make love to it

Dear One: 

Let me make love
To it.
Your mind tonight.

Climb inside it tonight. 

Let me caress the swagger

of your kind of crazy. 

  

Crazy persistent

Obstinate persistent

FOR-PLAY...FULL persistent

Mind

Full

  

Full.

  

Let me.

  

Make love to it.

Definition of a Drunk Love Heart #1: as told by akka b.

 Photo by Asha Tyska Mclaughlin

My own heart walks toward me... my very own heart.

Sprawled across decades. My decades. 

How can I explain

The enormity of these encounters...
And what it feels like to watch your own heart walk toward you?

Imagine the moon comes to join you for a midday lunch.

Imagine the sun meets your eye as you cross in a hall. 

AWAKE.
Like when a tree falls outside your bedroom window;

The breaking sound - the way the house shakes.

When summer sky gives birth to
Thunderstorm... that all over feeling.

A sense of transparency - someone knowing you too well. 

You can't look at them, but you can't look away. 

How can I explain?

What happens when the universe falls all over you.

The Whole Universe.

To describe it like a plane landing in your front yard would be weird, right?

How can I explain

What it's like to see your whole heart outside your body and walking toward you?

And realize it.

Realize what can't be explained.

I Actually Don't Know Anything About It

 ...except that sometimes I feel it under my eyelids, on my lips, inside my chest, wedged between my pelvic bones, toes, quivering fingers and sort of fixed in this invisible bouncing, bubbling, blanket of light. But other than that, I actually don't know anything about it.

The Gilded Door

There's this one door I love SO MUCH.
I know it's a funny thing to fall in love with a door, but thank goodness for funny things...right? It's not a gilded door as you might expect, with custom panels and silver knobs. No, it's a rather ordinary functional door, quietly doing its job; opening, closing etc.

But why akka b.? Why a door? 

Consider how many times life changes by opening a door, who you meet there, what you find there, what you leave behind. Falling in love with a door is easy; it records the living, hears every whisper, every tear, it lets you lean there - against it, slam it, bang it, walk through it...

Yes. I do believe the most sensible way to get through a wall is by using a door.

Either side lets you in or leaves you out - holds in warmth, keeps out cold, holds generally. And of course it makes you question. 

Question where you are going, what you are doing, why you are doing it, what made you do it. Question choices, courage and letting go. Letting it be. Letting it open. 

I've left my breath near a door many times - and found it too. 

 

For these reasons every door is certainly worthy of love. But it took this one door... this one odd door, to show me how to love them ALL. And that - is how I came to love this particular - ONE.   most.  

all-at-once

I feel encouraged by MOON to eat your HEART tonight.

sweet plum moon

In fact MOON shared some secrets...

sweet cherry blossom moon

Said the MOON,

"If you are going to fill yourself,
fill yourself all the way."

oh moon

"If you are going to empty yourself,
empty all the way..."

sweet giving moon

"If you are planning to eat someone's HEART,
eat their entire HEART."

sweet hungry moon

Tonight MOON drank three-thousand flasks of
Blue Cosmo Liqueur and gave sound advice.

sweet blue moon

So yes, tonight I feel encouraged to eat wholeheartedly

(because of what MOON said)

all-at-once

whole world in my...

The only thought I had was to cup my hand...


i found you
sitting in it
dancing a little
pouting some

Weaving gardens in the sand.

Between wrinkled creases, you traded rubies for goblets of lovely wine.

but

Having grown restless with excessive drink,
you scaled my lumpy fingers to improve upon your view,
and caught my eye.

My eye, being three times larger than your head,
must have startled you - like a dream,
because you vanished.

Only to return when light grew dim.

So you could hide behind my thumb,
so you could look without being seen,
so you could hope I wouldn't notice.

YOU.

With sandy toes and ruby garlands.